Curly hair

Curly hair is unnatural. No one is born with curly hair, really... Every single person that you meet with curly hair has either resorted to using a curler or some sort of artificial curling process to achieve that result.

Mother nature frowns upon poodles.

Milkshakes

Fact #1. Milkshakes were invented in the 1950's. They are delicious, milky and you should have one right now. Hand-shaken, please. Bunnies had nothing to do with it. Lobsters made them. And they only came in strawberry flavor. Chocolate milkshake is an abomination that should be abolished.

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To the world of accurate truth reporting.